Suffering In Silence, Such A Common Habit

Many people do this: they hide in the convolutions of their private shells to suffer in solitude, without saying anything and without anyone noticing. They show stoic resistance and they pretend all is well as their interior fights endless battles… Until one day, all of a sudden, they shatter into a thousand pieces.

We are social beings and yet most of us choose to suffer in silence. We prefer to share the laughs, the good times and we cling to the daily routines with those around us because this is how we manage to have a certain feeling of control. As if nothing is happening, as if nothing is devouring our emotional insides.

“You need more courage to face suffering than to face death.”

-Marlene Dietrich-

Psychologists and psychiatrists know full well that trauma and silence almost always go hand in hand. It is not easy to say out loud what hurts us, for two very concrete reasons: we are afraid of being judged and above all to show our vulnerability. Because in this relentless world, strong personalities triumph, those who can do everything, those who never complain and who show efficiency, optimism and self-confidence.

All of this undoubtedly leads us to the distressing sensation that today suffering is still stigmatized. This shows once again why there are so many depressed people who do not receive treatment and why today youth suicides are reaching worrying rates.

We suggest you think about this in this article.

Reasons why you MUST NOT suffer in silence

Not long ago, on the website of a well-known newspaper, a personal letter from a woman came out. She declared that she could not take it any longer in her life. She was a mother for the third time and felt unable to get out of bed. As curious as it sounds, almost 80% of the comments were negative, sometimes bordering on cruelty.

Love yourself a little more and you will suffer less …

Postpartum depression or the aftermath of childbirth, which is often difficult in women, is still a taboo these days. If a woman experiences this drop in morale, she is immediately punished because she is expected to always be 100%, happy and available. Hence the fact that many mothers experience this episode from the inside, in a private and almost disembodied way, fearing criticism from society.

It’s the same with adolescents and children who experience bullying in silence, without asking for help, in the cage of solitude and in the privacy of their room, the only place where they feel. safe. It is not good at all. It is necessary and almost imperative to react before it is too late, before the will flexes again, and our reality becomes nothing but a meaningless scribble.

6 reasons why we need to stop suffering in silence

• The first reason is as simple as it is obvious: the suffering lasts. In the event that it does not pass and that no one is solicited, it intensifies. It will be like a great suffocating shadow that encompasses everything.

• The symptoms will become more and more resistant, we will stop being people to become the reflection of pain, with a much deeper, more complex symptomatology.
• Negative thoughts will intensify. And we’ll find ourselves locked in our own prison.
• There will come a time when social contact will be uncomfortable and we will reject it. Hugs, emotional caresses and kind words will lose their original meaning to us. We will view them with suspicion and we will interpret them as threats.
• Postponing the need to seek help will make further processing much more complex.
• We will perpetuate the stigma ourselves. Failure to take the plunge, refusing to seek professional attention or explaining what is happening to someone you trust fuels the idea more than trauma and suffering. go hand in hand and must be experienced in silence.

Finally, and this is no less important, we must know that suffering changes us. She chisels us as she pleases to transform us into someone else. We stop being true to ourselves and this is something no one deserves.

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Connect to heal

Suffering isolates, but the connection with other people and with oneself is therapeutic and healing. Sharing our vulnerabilities and pain with the right person or with a quality professional allows two notable advances. The first is that we stop self-sabotaging. No one chooses to suffer from postpartum depression. No one deserves to be bullied, or a slave to a traumatic past, to a lost childhood. No one deserves to neglect himself to the point of ceasing to love himself either.

“When you are in pain, force yourself to remember a happy time. One firefly is the end of darkness. ”

-Alexandre Jodorowsky-

The second benefit that we get is a good emotional catharsis. The people who go to a psychology cabinet dressed in the armor of anger, hiding the fragile being inside them are very numerous. Day after day, reconciliation and good connection with those around them will intensify and allow the shields of suffering to gradually fall.

It’s a slow and laborious process, no doubt, but it’s something we all deserve: to stop suffering in silence and rely on someone who understands and helps us. We reflect on this, we emerge from the shell of our unselected loneliness to allow ourselves to be ourselves again, and fearlessly.

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