Postmodern Solitudes And Myths Of Love
Postmodern loneliness is the result of a long process in which the concept of individualism has gradually established itself. Two contradictory ideas slowly took hold in the culture. One, that everyone must create their own home. The other, that loneliness is something terrible.
Likewise, postmodern loneliness derives from an increasingly palpable fact: we fear the other. The concept of the other has almost completely disappeared. Our world is made up of people from our surroundings and strangers. And the latter does not interest us. There is something threatening about people who are foreign to us.
The result is a society in which people are increasingly alone, but struggle with loneliness. We have created a world in which we are neither able to live in community nor to live alone. Loneliness and companionship became a problem.
Loneliness, a concept that has become problematic
The theme of loneliness was not significant until Romanticism. Before him, loneliness was not a source of great reflection , nor of deep existential problems. We accepted being born and dying alone.
Individualism had not had such a preponderant place either. The individuals lived mainly in community. It was common for the whole family to live in the same house. Grandparents, children, grandchildren and often close relatives. Neighborhood relations were also very strong. People knew each other when they lived in a nearby place.
There was also the rituals collective that involved virtually the entire population. Sunday mass or service, local festivals, etc. There was a clear concept that everyone was part of a community.
Romanticism has changed. The couple have become the answer to everything. An isolated and private couple, immersed in their own world. The company gradually organized itself around the couple and the minimum family nucleus to which it gave rise. At the same time, loneliness began to take on a dramatic connotation. To become undesirable.
Postmodern solitudes
After the transition from the large family and the large community to the society of couples, a new reality gradually emerged with the introduction of new technologies. The postmodern solitudes were therefore officially inaugurated. They evolve in a fundamental contradiction: we are connected to the whole world and we feel more alone than ever.
Some people feel so lonely that they feel bad when they don’t get likes on their social media posts. There is so much loneliness that social media addiction already exists. These people find themselves trapped by receiving and sending messages, even if they have little or no interest.
Thus, the couple acquires a totally disproportionate meaning in the context of postmodern solitudes. We consider that not having a spouse is synonymous with loneliness. As if the world boils down only to the couple. So that a love breakup throws us into the abyss of total misery. As if only the couple were a source of gratification.
Challenge the myths of love and loneliness
Perhaps the time has come to challenge the myths about loneliness and love. Postmodern loneliness proves that something is wrong. Today’s culture does not lead us to a sense of peace, wholeness or happiness. Quite the contrary. Emotional difficulties or psychological problems are more and more frequent.
Let’s start by remembering something that most of us know. We all need love. However, the love of a couple is only one of the many manifestations of this feeling. There is also love in family, friends, ideas and causes, humanity and, of course, ourselves. Reducing our concerns and our expectations only to the love of a couple impoverishes us enormously and makes us more vulnerable.
It is also necessary to question the content of these postmodern solitudes. When do we start to deny loneliness? This is a reality for which there is no antidote. We are born alone and we will die alone. The others are always in our life like a loan. The more we understand ourselves with our loneliness, the more we will be qualified to live and also to die.
Our thoughts Loneliness and anxiety are two conditions that often go hand in hand. So, how do you learn to appreciate solitude so as not to be anxious?
