5 Causes Of Exacerbated Narcissism

5 causes of exacerbated narcissism

The causes of exacerbated narcissism are linked to deficiencies and excesses known during childhood. Sometimes what takes precedence is a pattern of withdrawal; there is a lack of proof of affection and of the correct stimulation. On other occasions, the predominant note is excess: parents have gone too far in meeting children’s needs.

The problems associated with narcissism have different levels. Sometimes it’s just a part of the way you are. On other occasions, we can speak of a real narcissistic personality disorder, which is more serious. In the latter case, splendor and selfishness pervade the whole personality, as do sometimes certain antisocial traits.

Depending on what are the causes of the exacerbated narcissism, this will leave one mark or another in the personality. Either way, there are certain traits in common, although of a different intensity.

In general, what predominates is splendor, arrogance, exploitation of others and relationship problems. There can be many hidden traits that denote feelings of inferiority. Whatever the case, the main causes of exacerbated narcissism are as follows.

Sometimes it is believed that people who suffered from abuse during their childhood have become very reserved people. However, this is not always true. Often, the exact opposite occurs. In other words, the victim develops a narcissistic personality. She wants to be above others all the time.

child looking out the window

Abuse is one of the most complex causes of exacerbated narcissism. What happens in this case is that this trait operates as a mechanism of compensation and defense. Indeed, the idea is forged of thinking “I will never be anyone’s victim again”. This is why the personal image “swells” so much that it ends up becoming an exaggerated exaltation of the self.

When there is abandonment, something similar happens to what happens with abuse; the person experienced such a feeling of vulnerability in their childhood that they decide to raise a wall between themselves and the world. This wall is narcissism. The main consequence of giving up, in this case, is a profound difficulty in feeling empathy.

What happens in these cases is that narcissism acts like a shell. In addition, in this shell hides an extremely weak person. This is why it is common for people of this type to experience real terror when faced with the rejection of others, or else they are very ashamed of the state of their interior. Narcissism only serves to hide them.

The inconsistency of parents is one of the causes of exacerbated narcissism. Inconsistency is a lack of congruence. It can be observed via a gap between words and acts, or between the acts themselves. Indeed, it concerns parents who say one thing but do another, or even those who are erratic and whose actions we can never foresee or anticipate.

This is characteristic of anxious parents, and gives rise to great insecurity in the children. These parents give their children exaggerated compliments, but also harsh criticisms. Narcissism is the response to the anguish that comes from being in the hands of a changing and inconsistent criterion.

teenage girl in the middle of her parents argument

This mechanism is very typical of parents with a feeling of guilt. Perhaps they are not giving their children enough time and attention, and they know this is incorrect; therefore, in order to compensate for the suffering, they often and uncertainly try to emphasize certain qualities in their children, and whether the latter really exhibit these qualities or not, since they know very little about them.

They do this through excessive praise and expensive gifts. It is a way for these parents to compensate and cover their lack of genuine affection. They feel obligated to celebrate everything their child does so that no one can doubt the affection they feel for them. In such a context, some children therefore begin to construct an idealized image of themselves, which is not at all realistic.

Overprotection is a form of abuse. It sends a message of fear and anxiety. She installs a thought in the mind of the child: that leading him to believe that he is incapable of facing the vicissitudes of life. But overprotection also makes children think that they have “something special” that must be constantly taken care of, a fragility that is immanent in their being. This feeds both insecurity and exacerbated narcissism in him.

Over time, a defensive blockage occurs. The person settles in a bubble. She thinks that others, if they love her, should protect her and serve her needs. She becomes insensitive to the needs of others.

young man in his bubble

Most of the causes of exacerbated narcissism are related to the narcissism of the parents themselves. Sometimes they want to mend the wounds in their self-esteem through their children, or even fulfill their own narcissistic desires. The problem is, they end up doing just the opposite; in this sense, let us not forget that psychotherapy can make a decisive contribution to restructuring a self-esteem that is healthy and has real strength.

 

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